A person sitting on top of a mountain yearningly overlooking the mountains.

2016. A year to be

2016.  A year to be.

Every year I tend to look back and forward.  Or really…forward then back.  Its a two way street with many lanes of thought that go through it.  I go into every year not knowing what is to come.  I am thankful for where I have been but a bit insecure about what opportunities will arise.  Will I have the same opportunities as I have the previous years?  The optimist in me says, “look back at where you came from…is that not proof enough?!”  On the outside I am cool, calm and collected.  On the inside I am squirming.  This “business” to me is my baby, my love, my passion.  There is nothing I want more than to make it successful.  And to some I am successful. And yet I push on.  You see, a lot of people around me seem to think I have my stuff together.  I don’t.   I am just struggling to stay afloat like anyone else.  Society tells me to negate my feelings.  Be tough.  Don’t feel.  Maybe its just where I am right now…but f* that!

This makes me think…What makes us…us?  Yes we are skin and bones, but we are not just that.  We are a complex being with emotions, thoughts, and feelings.  Expressing our feelings is needed.  The only problem is that we live in a society that believes in subsiding these feelings.  Hiding them, and when we cant…coping them with food, drugs, or even how many likes we can get on facebook.  We try to negate our feelings with these distractions.  We try to make our lives look glorious with our highlight reels, but never let anyone see the full tape and the struggle we went through to get there.

One thing 2015 taught me is that I have to travel; it’s necessary. I have to truly love my clients, or what is the point?  And to be vulnerable.  You see, vulnerability makes us step out of our comfort zone.  It makes us grow. and we must actively be putting ourselves in a vulnerable state, because the payoff is well worth the risk.  In 2015 I was able to connect with a client on a hike.  I shared my fears and in turn he has shared his with me.  It was the most amazing life lesson in the most simple way.  Connect with people.  In being vulnerable with each other we find encouragement.

Life is a struggle. Struggle together.



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